Update on Risotto Man.....

The hardest part about this whole "blog my personal life so people can read it." Is the blogging of my personal life. I know that sounds just the littlest bit strange seeing as how no one is making me do this blog. The whole point of this blog thought is not only to talk about food but my forays into the dating world. Those that know me know that I suck at dating. And its totally true. I do suck at dating. I'm not that good at it, but I do keep trying. The last serious, real boyfriend that I had was my *evil ex*. We broke up for good, well.... 3 years ago. We were together for several years and it was on and off and on and off. It took me a while to realize how detrimental that relationship was to me. How much it impacted me so negatively. It still surprises me how much he seeped into my life and how his ...well... his meanness affected me. The footprints that he left on me are deep and have had a more profound affect on me than I realize. But I don't want to get into this right now. Let me do a quick recap of the last few months and men during my search for my Risotto Man....

The Cowboy

Or the Texan. What ever you want to call him. He liked his whiskey... a lot. He also liked guns... a lot. You can actually read about this one. I was on top of it, kind of, and wrote about him. I was pretty surprised when he uttered the words "I just don't think we're clicking."

Mr. Market

Ah, Mr.Market. What I wanted to say to you was grow some balls man! I hate men who second guess themselves all the time. I don't want to date a man who I have to tell him to do things... all things and then he wonders why he didn't think of it. He drove me crazy but he ended leaving me. I know, I wasn't even interested in him but he ended up leaving me. Truthfully, I was relieved. But when this happened I realized something about myself... I didn't know when to cut my loses. When to cut and run. And while I'm not so good at it yet, at least I realized it now.

Mr. Jane Austin

Word to the wise... if a guy has a name that is remotely close to an villain in a Jane Austin novel... don't date. Just run. I had known this guy for years....years! He even came and visited me in LA when I lived there. Once I moved back, we tried dating and he disappeared. Then reappeared, full of apologies and saying that he wanted to really make it work and (I kid you not, these are his exact words) He "wanted nothing more than to make me his girlfriend". That morphed into the fact that he wanted to marry me and that he wanted to have kids. You would think that he is my Risotto Man, that my story would be over and that you all are coming to a wedding!

Well....you'd be wrong.

When he said that he wanted to marry me, he actually meant that he and I were friends. I found this out after we had been dating for a while and he and I went to lunch with an old friend of his and she didn't know we were dating. I was surprised and I called him out on this.

Don't be sad for me friends! I actually spoke my mind and shared my feelings! I was proud of myself. Not every story that has an ending is a happy ending, some of them lead you to another door.


NOW ....

I'm still searching, I'm still looking for my Risotto man. I think part of the reason that I haven't found him yet is that I'm still looking for my mojo, my courage, my feather. Wait! You ask, what do you mean 'your feather?' Well, my sister and I were driving the other day and we were talking about getting back our courage. One of us said 'you need your feather'. You remember Dumbo? In order to fly he needed his feather.

In order to date, to get my mojo, to get my courage, to get my 'meness'....

I'm going to get my feather.

Pastry ... yea... its his pastry....

Oh me oh my!!

This is Johnny Iuzzini. Isn’t he handsome? He is the 2006 James Beard Foundation winner for “Outstanding Pastry Chef of the Year”. Wait….you don’t know what that is? What the helz is wrong with you?? It’s the Oscars, Tony’s, Grammy’s and Superbowl all rolled into one for foodies. (Foodie- informal term for a particular class of aficionado of food and drink)

He also released a book called ‘Dessert Fourplay: Sweet Quartets From A Four-Star Pastry Chef’

**swoon**

I think it’s the sweet and innocent look on his face and then BAM …. His arms are tatted up. There’s something to be said about a man that looks like he's all vanilla and then all of the sudden there is wide ribbon of dark chocolate. Sweet, innocent with a dark edge. YUM!

Now, I am by far not a fancy chef. If I was put on Top Chef or Iron Chef I would crumple under the pressure…well maybe not crumple but you would see me leaning against the counter drinking a glass of wine whilst my competitors raced around me. As long as I had my red...all would be fine. But this super hunky chef makes me want to temper some chocolate, puff some pastry and cream some whip. I mean....look at those hands! So steady, so sure, so .... so.... manly!

This....by the way starts my new infatuation with what I like to refer to as "hunky chefs..that should date me."

Thoughts from my mom

"Let's flip a coin between you girls to see whose wedding your father and I will pay for first."

"Mom...neither one of us has a boyfriend."

Prickly Pear Jam!

"SON OF A NUT CRACKER!!!"

Said for my mother's benefit as I fell up the mountain into a cactus while trying to get more prickly pears for the baskets my sisters and I make for our friends.

This was not the first prickly pear gathering that we had tried to do this particular year.
Laura (my sister) and I had stopped outside of Wikenberg on the way up to the mountains. We had all been a touch worried since we hadn't seen any near my parents house so we had decided in our infante wisdom that stopping the car on the side of highway 93 with two small puppies was super smart.

And I personally had decided that picking prickly pears in flip flops in high grass where you can actually see the desert floor was equally intelligent.



This actually wasn't at all smart in any way shape or form.
Laura's puppies freaked out and kept hiding behind her legs since the cars were whizzing by us a mere 10 feet away. Which meet I was gathering the fruit (yes, the red bulbs on the top of the cacti are called fruit) by myself .... in the tall grass .... in flip flops.

Whoa boy! I am a smart one!!

The thing with gathering the fruit from the cacti is that you need to use metal tongs as the juicy fruit is covered in teeny tiny opaque needles. Needles that if you get in you are really hard to get out. As I'm congratulating myself on my ability to gather all this fruit by myself with cars whizzing by, a sudden lull in traffic occurs..... and a very distinctive rattle was suddenly heard.

Picture me, Laura and the puppies running for our lives next to the highway with traffic and hauling a bucket full of fruit covered in needles.




Once we got the fruit to my parents cabin we started the hard part, de-needling the prickly pears.

This means that they needed to be boiled and boiled and boiled and boiled and boiled.
To do this, we hooked up the propane tank and a the pot we use to deep fry turkey.
after that, we had to
strain and strain and strain and strain and strain and strain
the softened fruit.
We broke down the fruit and then used a dish towel that we ran the juice through several times.
Whatever you do ...

DO NOT SQUEEZE
the juice to hasten the straining. You will get those super fun needles in your jam ... and then on your toast .... and into your mouth!

OUCH!



The first time we did this process we only yielded about half a quart of juice.
Enough to make only 12 jars tiny of jam.
Which is why we then went off to see if there was maybe possibly a few prickly pears left on the mountain.

SURPRISE!
There is apparently a difference in elevation (silly us). Which resulted in a longer life for the fruit. Hmmm.... I guess the highway adventure was not really needed.

Instead climbing mountains to find fruit would have been "easier". I mean, we did all fall in cactus.
But the juice from the prickly pears from the mountain was amazing!

Yes, this jam requires a lot of work. But oh man.....
This jam is so totally worth it!!

The recipie is for after you have done the juicing.

What you need:
1 package pectin
2 1/2 cups prickly pear juice
3 tbl lemon juice
3 1/2 cups sugar

What you do:
Combine pectin and prickly pear juice and bring to a hard boil
Add sugar and lemon juice and bring to a hard boil again
Boil 3 more minutes, wait until the mixture is glossy
Remove from heat and and skim the foam
Pour into prepared jars and before you seal make sure that that the glass is clean
Put on the lid and rings, make sure the jar 'pops'
Let cool

If you cant wait to try the jam, you can always eat the foam. It becomes kind of gelatinous and is really good.

If you want help....... you'll have to call my Mom or my aunt Mary Ellen.

New Design!

Welcome to the new and improved website! Thanks to my little sister who is a media genius and helped me update this rusty ole’ thing to something much more visually appealing!

Heidi was kind enough to update this into something much prettier. I still use a spiral day-planner for my week instead of the nifty calendar on my phone, that's how technologically handicapped I am. Heidi was sweet enough to take time to make this more visually appealing. She worked hard while I enjoyed a cup of joe in my pj's at my parents cabin.

Thanks lil' sister!
Now please teach me picnic.

Thoughts from my mom

“We’re going to go up there and flirt with all the college boys!”

“Oh good! You’re going to go be a cougar! Rar!!”

“Mom, I’m not that old”

Quick Ratatouille, comfort food

Well folks, on those days when life seems like it's just tough and the men are all thick and stupid, this is the dish to reach for. Its supper easy and supper yummy. It helps cure the knot in your stomach cause he didn't call and is apparently a huge moron.


Things you need:
3 cloves crushed garlic
1 med eggplant, halved and sliced crosswise (half-circles)
3 med zucchini, sliced
2 cups mushrooms, sliced
4 sprigs fresh thyme
1 can stewed tomatoes
1/2 c red wine
1 Tbl Olive Oil




Heat olive oil in the dutch oven. This one is my sister's, she got it for Christmas and was nice enough to let me try it out! Once the oil is heated add the garlic and thyme and Sauté. I really love the frozen garlic that I bought from Trader Joes. When I'm in a hurry it makes this faster and easier!



Pour the wine into the pan and stir. YUM!
If your using eggplant add them and the squash. I don't like the texture of eggplant so I don't use it. Stir to coat all the veggies and the add the tomatoes. Let this delicious joy simmer until the squash is tender.



Add mushrooms and let simmer until cooked.

When you plate, add cheese. It makes it even gooeyer and yummier! See easy and once you eat it you will taste how super comforting it is.